Interpersonal Relationships
Psychologist Abraham Maslow claims that there is a basic human need to belong and to be accepted by others. close relationships- whether with a family member, partner or friend influence not only our emotional state, but our health as well. Examples are the following:
Berscheid and Hatfield (1972) have destinguished between passionate and companionate love. Companionate love is warm, trusting, tolerant. Passionate love is a complete absorption in another that includes sexual feelings and intense emotion.
- The chances of surviving for more than one year after a heart attack are more than twice as high among elderly men and women who can count on two or more people for emotional support than among those who do not have such support (Berkman et al. 1992)
- Steven Cole (2007) found that chronic lonliness increased gene activity linked to inflammation, and reduced gene activity assosiated with antibody production and antiviral responses.
Berscheid and Hatfield (1972) have destinguished between passionate and companionate love. Companionate love is warm, trusting, tolerant. Passionate love is a complete absorption in another that includes sexual feelings and intense emotion.
Robert Strernberg suggested a Triangular Theory of Love (1988)
There are 3 ingredients of love: Passsion (batterflies, euphoria) Intimacy ( warmth, closeness, sharing) Commitment (intent to maintain a relationship in spite of the difficulties and costs) Romantic love- combination of high intimacy and passion. Companionate love- combination of intimacy and commitmen without passion. Consummate love- all three areas qually. |
- Examine biological, psychological and social origins of attraction.
Origin of attraction: biological level of analysis
Animals display behavior much similar to one of humans when they are attracted to each other. Evolutionary theories argue that the purpose of attraction is to procreate, that is to ensure that an individual’s genes are passed onto the next generation.
A characteristic symptom of romantic love is the obsession with the loved one. Lovers are not able to turn off their thoughts, so most of their waking hours pass with thinking about their sweetheart. The biological level of analysis argues that the overwhelming sense of love is actually the result of a biochemical cocktail. The anthropologist Fischer argues that the “symptoms” exhibited in human romantic passion indicate that dopamine, adrenaline, and serotonin all play an important role. According to Fischer, romantic love is not an emotion, but rather a motivation system – a need or a craving – designed to enable lovers to mate. In this sense, humans are much like other animals.
It is adrenaline that makes one’s hear race, one’s palms become sweaty and one’s mouth go dry when in the presence of that new special someone. Adrenaline is a stress hormone. Increased levels of this hormone result in high energy, less need for sleep and food, and more focused attention on the potential mate, according to Fischer.
Serotonin is another neurotransmitter that may be involved in love. It could perhaps explain the continuous focus on the beloved. A study in Pisa showed that the early stage of love really changes the way people think. Marazziti et al. studied 60 individuals: 20 were men and women who had fallen in love in the previous six months; 20 others suffered from untreated obsessive-compulsive disorder; 20 more were normal, healthy individuals who were not in love – these were used as controls. Analysis of blood samples from the lovers showed that the serotonin levels of new lovers were equivalent to the low serotonin levels found in people with OCD. The limitation of the study is that the researchers analyzed serotonin levels in the blood, not in the brain. Fischer argues that until scientists have documented the activity of serotonin in specific brain regions, it is not possible to document the possible connection between romantic love and low levels of serotonin.
Fischer et al. used an fMRI to investigate blood flow in the brains of men and women who were madly in love. They had to look at the photos of their beloved ones, and then after a neutral filler task they had to look at the photo of their acquaintance. The researchers got what Fischer calls “a beautiful picture of the brain in love”, showing activity in the brain’s reward system, which is activated by a pleasant stimulus. The researchers found that the “brain’s reward system” was particularly active when the lovers looked at pictures of the object of their love – and they also found that the more passionate they were, the more active the brain’s reward circuitry was. This confirmed the pre-experimental self-reports, thus supporting a correlation between the attitudes towards the lover and brain activity.
role of hormones in bonding
Evolutionary explanations
Origin of attraction: Cognitive level of analysis
One of the psychological origins of attraction relates to perception and social cognition. Researchers argue that the extent to which people perceive another person as similar to themselves may be one explanation for attraction. Contrary to the adage that “opposites attract”, it appears that those whom we perceive to be similar to ourselves are more attractive to us. Couples tend to be similar in age, religion, social class, cultural background, personality, education, intelligence, physical attractiveness, and attitudes. Maybe this is because over the course of history people tend to live in groups with people who are like themselves. People tend to assume that those who are similar to them will like them. Shared interests are a part of what attracts people to each other.
Name: Attraction-similarity model
Researcher: Markey et al.
Date: 2007
Definition: Morry suggested the attraction-similarity model, which the researcher believes underpins people’s perceptions of relationships. Individuals have beliefs about relationships; generally, people tend to see friends and partners as similar to themselves.
Aim: To investigate the extent to which similarity is a factor in the way people choose partners.
Method: Using questionnaires, the researchers asked a large sample of young people to describe the psychological characteristics, values, and attitudes of their ideal romantic partner, without thinking of anyone in particular. Afterwards, they were asked to describe themselves. In a follow of the study, the researchers used 106 young couples, who had been together for a year. They filled out a questionnaire about their own as well as their partner’s characteristics.
Results: The results showed that the way the young people described themselves was similar to what their ideal partner looked like. The result of a follow-up study was in line with the first investigation.
Conclusion: The study confirmed that people want partners who are similar to themselves. This could explain why they perceive their partner to be similar; but perception and actual behavior may not always be congruent at the end of the day.
Evaluation:
Pros:
· The results are based on a relatively large sample, and this enhances the validity of the study
Cons:
· The study was based on self-reports, which are liable to lack some reliability.
· The sample consisted of young Americans, so it is not possible to generalize to other populations unless similar research were to be conducted in other cultures to confirm the results.
Name: The role of self-esteem in relationship formation
Researcher: Kiesler and Baral
Date: 1970
definition: In order to test whether self-esteem has an effect on partner selection, Kiesler and Baral (1970) carried out an experiment.
Aim: To see if the people seek a partner that is similar to them and how factors could influence a person’s perception and thus who they would pick as a partner (mate)
Method: Gave a fake IQ test to a group of men. Then told some of the men that they did excellent and others that they did so bad they couldn’t even account for the errors. Then the men went to a room and an attractive women came into the room to see if the men’s fake IQ test affected there self-esteem and thus affecting how they acted with the attractive women.
Results: They found that the men who got an excellent score engaged in conversation more quickly with the attractive women than the other men who did terrible.
Conclusion: Therefore this shows that people seek a partner that is similar to them and how factors can influence a person’s perception and thus who they would pick a a mate.
Reciprocity:
Animals display behavior much similar to one of humans when they are attracted to each other. Evolutionary theories argue that the purpose of attraction is to procreate, that is to ensure that an individual’s genes are passed onto the next generation.
A characteristic symptom of romantic love is the obsession with the loved one. Lovers are not able to turn off their thoughts, so most of their waking hours pass with thinking about their sweetheart. The biological level of analysis argues that the overwhelming sense of love is actually the result of a biochemical cocktail. The anthropologist Fischer argues that the “symptoms” exhibited in human romantic passion indicate that dopamine, adrenaline, and serotonin all play an important role. According to Fischer, romantic love is not an emotion, but rather a motivation system – a need or a craving – designed to enable lovers to mate. In this sense, humans are much like other animals.
It is adrenaline that makes one’s hear race, one’s palms become sweaty and one’s mouth go dry when in the presence of that new special someone. Adrenaline is a stress hormone. Increased levels of this hormone result in high energy, less need for sleep and food, and more focused attention on the potential mate, according to Fischer.
Serotonin is another neurotransmitter that may be involved in love. It could perhaps explain the continuous focus on the beloved. A study in Pisa showed that the early stage of love really changes the way people think. Marazziti et al. studied 60 individuals: 20 were men and women who had fallen in love in the previous six months; 20 others suffered from untreated obsessive-compulsive disorder; 20 more were normal, healthy individuals who were not in love – these were used as controls. Analysis of blood samples from the lovers showed that the serotonin levels of new lovers were equivalent to the low serotonin levels found in people with OCD. The limitation of the study is that the researchers analyzed serotonin levels in the blood, not in the brain. Fischer argues that until scientists have documented the activity of serotonin in specific brain regions, it is not possible to document the possible connection between romantic love and low levels of serotonin.
Fischer et al. used an fMRI to investigate blood flow in the brains of men and women who were madly in love. They had to look at the photos of their beloved ones, and then after a neutral filler task they had to look at the photo of their acquaintance. The researchers got what Fischer calls “a beautiful picture of the brain in love”, showing activity in the brain’s reward system, which is activated by a pleasant stimulus. The researchers found that the “brain’s reward system” was particularly active when the lovers looked at pictures of the object of their love – and they also found that the more passionate they were, the more active the brain’s reward circuitry was. This confirmed the pre-experimental self-reports, thus supporting a correlation between the attitudes towards the lover and brain activity.
role of hormones in bonding
- The British psychiatrist Bowlby (1969) suggested that humans have an innate attachment system which consist of specific behaviors and psychological responses called attachment behaviors.
- Adult attachment appears to be the result of the hormones oxytocin and vasopressin.
- Oxytocin is a powerful hormone, released in both men and women during touching and sex that tends to deepen and intensify feeling of attachment.
- Experiments conducted on laboratory rats have shown that when oxytocin is inhibited, new mothers reject their young.
- Another important hormone for long-term commitment is vasopressin, which is also released during sex.
- When male prairie voles were given a drug that suppressed the effects of vasopressin, they lost their devotion to their mates and no longer protected them potential suitors.
Evolutionary explanations
- Buss (1996) has suggested that jealousy may be biologically based. He found that women’s patterns of jealousy vary through their menstrual cycle. When oestrogen levels are low, women appear to be more sexually jealous.
- In another example, Low (1990) carried out an analysis of 186 cultures and found a strong correlation between the number of parasites the population is exposed to- or the degree of pathogen stress and the degree of polygyny which is when males have more then one sexual partner or spouse.
- Symmetrical facial features are considered as more attractive.
- Men with symmetrical faces and body features also have higher basal metabolic rates and sometimes lower IQs.
Origin of attraction: Cognitive level of analysis
One of the psychological origins of attraction relates to perception and social cognition. Researchers argue that the extent to which people perceive another person as similar to themselves may be one explanation for attraction. Contrary to the adage that “opposites attract”, it appears that those whom we perceive to be similar to ourselves are more attractive to us. Couples tend to be similar in age, religion, social class, cultural background, personality, education, intelligence, physical attractiveness, and attitudes. Maybe this is because over the course of history people tend to live in groups with people who are like themselves. People tend to assume that those who are similar to them will like them. Shared interests are a part of what attracts people to each other.
Name: Attraction-similarity model
Researcher: Markey et al.
Date: 2007
Definition: Morry suggested the attraction-similarity model, which the researcher believes underpins people’s perceptions of relationships. Individuals have beliefs about relationships; generally, people tend to see friends and partners as similar to themselves.
Aim: To investigate the extent to which similarity is a factor in the way people choose partners.
Method: Using questionnaires, the researchers asked a large sample of young people to describe the psychological characteristics, values, and attitudes of their ideal romantic partner, without thinking of anyone in particular. Afterwards, they were asked to describe themselves. In a follow of the study, the researchers used 106 young couples, who had been together for a year. They filled out a questionnaire about their own as well as their partner’s characteristics.
Results: The results showed that the way the young people described themselves was similar to what their ideal partner looked like. The result of a follow-up study was in line with the first investigation.
Conclusion: The study confirmed that people want partners who are similar to themselves. This could explain why they perceive their partner to be similar; but perception and actual behavior may not always be congruent at the end of the day.
Evaluation:
Pros:
· The results are based on a relatively large sample, and this enhances the validity of the study
Cons:
· The study was based on self-reports, which are liable to lack some reliability.
· The sample consisted of young Americans, so it is not possible to generalize to other populations unless similar research were to be conducted in other cultures to confirm the results.
Name: The role of self-esteem in relationship formation
Researcher: Kiesler and Baral
Date: 1970
definition: In order to test whether self-esteem has an effect on partner selection, Kiesler and Baral (1970) carried out an experiment.
Aim: To see if the people seek a partner that is similar to them and how factors could influence a person’s perception and thus who they would pick as a partner (mate)
Method: Gave a fake IQ test to a group of men. Then told some of the men that they did excellent and others that they did so bad they couldn’t even account for the errors. Then the men went to a room and an attractive women came into the room to see if the men’s fake IQ test affected there self-esteem and thus affecting how they acted with the attractive women.
Results: They found that the men who got an excellent score engaged in conversation more quickly with the attractive women than the other men who did terrible.
Conclusion: Therefore this shows that people seek a partner that is similar to them and how factors can influence a person’s perception and thus who they would pick a a mate.
Reciprocity:
- Reciprocity states that relarionships are depedent on people’s perception of rewards and costs.
- The reason why reciprocity occurs is that helping a partner makes one feel good about oneself- a phenomenon called self-enchancement.
- Studies suggest that people seek feedback that matches and supportd their self-concepts as well- a process known as self-varification.
Origins of attraction: sociocultrual level of analysis
- It seems that people prefer similarity in a partner, as well as a partner who can contribute positively to their own self-esteem.
- People who live close to one another tend to be similar and so probably have the same social and cultural norms of what is attractive in a partner.
- Western social psychologists have investigated and found that people are attracted to those with whom they have a positive interaction.
- Several studies have found that frequency of interaction is a good prediction of liking.
- Festinger et al. (1950) found that friendships in a dormitory tended to form among those who lived near one another.
- Nahemow and Lewton (1975) found that in homes for the elderly and on college campuses, the distances between rooms predicted friendship and attraction.
- We compare our feelings and reactions to others so that we can better understand ourselves (Schachter 1959)
- The familiar is more likeable than the unfamiliar.
- This has been demonstrated in research by Zejonc et al. (1971), when researchers asked participants to evaluate photos of strangers. Some of the photos were shown repeatedly during the experiment. Those strangers who were shown more frequently were rated more positively.
- Zajong argues that the more expose effect increases a sense of trust.
- Discuss the role of communication in maintaining relationships.
The role of communication in maintaining relationships
In happy relationships, attributions tend to be positively biased towards the partner – that is, positive behaviors are seen as dispositional, and negative behaviors are seen as situational. Unhealthy relationships are the opposite: these relationships also employ a stable and global attribution to the partner’s behavior.
Bradbury and Fincham argue that the attributions a married couple makes will influence their behavior towards each other. They found that wives who had the tendency to make dispositional attributions about their husbands in negative situations were also more likely to behave negatively towards their husband. The opposite was found in wives who made dispositional attributions about their husband in positive situations. According to researchers, this might be because unhappy couples simply have negative attributions and behave negatively towards each other.
A study done by the same researchers followed married couples in a 12-month longitudinal study and found that the kind of attributions made be the couple in the beginning of the study did predict marital satisfaction at the end of the study. Level of satisfaction with the relationship in the beginning of the study did not predict what kinds of attributions the couple made at the end of the study. This could indicate that it is the kinds of attributions, which influence the behavior of couples rather than the other way round.
It seems, that communication plays an integral role in the maintenance of relationships. This is supported by Altman and Taylor’s social penetration theory, which argues that close relationships are formed by a gradual process of self-disclosure. Self-disclosure is the sharing of facts about one’s life with a loved one, as well as inner thoughts, feelings and emotions. Disclosing something about yourself makes both strangers and friends like you more. Self-disclosure leads to self-validation – the feeling of being truly known and accepted by the listener. A deeper mutual understanding allows each partner to meet the needs of the other more easily. It is also a symbol of trust, which is a key factor in attachment.
A meta-analysis of disclosure studies by Collins & Miller found that people who disclose intimate information about themselves are more liked that people who don’t, that people tent to disclose more personal information to those that they like, and if people disclose information to someone, they tend to like the person more.
Women are more likely to disclose than men are. Also women are more likely to respond to somebody’s negative feelings with understanding and acceptance, they are likely to show support, while men are more likely to take initial disclosure as a problem and offer a helpful advice. This leads to misunderstandings, because women expect support, while men expect an advice, but it happens vice versa.
In happy relationships, attributions tend to be positively biased towards the partner – that is, positive behaviors are seen as dispositional, and negative behaviors are seen as situational. Unhealthy relationships are the opposite: these relationships also employ a stable and global attribution to the partner’s behavior.
Bradbury and Fincham argue that the attributions a married couple makes will influence their behavior towards each other. They found that wives who had the tendency to make dispositional attributions about their husbands in negative situations were also more likely to behave negatively towards their husband. The opposite was found in wives who made dispositional attributions about their husband in positive situations. According to researchers, this might be because unhappy couples simply have negative attributions and behave negatively towards each other.
A study done by the same researchers followed married couples in a 12-month longitudinal study and found that the kind of attributions made be the couple in the beginning of the study did predict marital satisfaction at the end of the study. Level of satisfaction with the relationship in the beginning of the study did not predict what kinds of attributions the couple made at the end of the study. This could indicate that it is the kinds of attributions, which influence the behavior of couples rather than the other way round.
It seems, that communication plays an integral role in the maintenance of relationships. This is supported by Altman and Taylor’s social penetration theory, which argues that close relationships are formed by a gradual process of self-disclosure. Self-disclosure is the sharing of facts about one’s life with a loved one, as well as inner thoughts, feelings and emotions. Disclosing something about yourself makes both strangers and friends like you more. Self-disclosure leads to self-validation – the feeling of being truly known and accepted by the listener. A deeper mutual understanding allows each partner to meet the needs of the other more easily. It is also a symbol of trust, which is a key factor in attachment.
A meta-analysis of disclosure studies by Collins & Miller found that people who disclose intimate information about themselves are more liked that people who don’t, that people tent to disclose more personal information to those that they like, and if people disclose information to someone, they tend to like the person more.
Women are more likely to disclose than men are. Also women are more likely to respond to somebody’s negative feelings with understanding and acceptance, they are likely to show support, while men are more likely to take initial disclosure as a problem and offer a helpful advice. This leads to misunderstandings, because women expect support, while men expect an advice, but it happens vice versa.
- Explain the role that culture plays in the formation and maintenance of relationships.
Role of culture in the formation and maintenance of relationships
Cultural norms play an important role in the formation and maintenance of relationships. It has been noted that much of the theory and research on the origins of relationships is a reflection of US culture, and not enough cross-cultural research has been carried out.
Goodwin argues that passionate love is largely a western phenomenon. In the West, marriage is seen as the culmination of loving relationship. In cultures where arranged marriages occur, the relationship between love and marriage is the other way round.
Matsumoto: “The reason for this difference is quite clear. You Americans marry the person you love; we love the person we marry.”
Gupta & Singh found that couples in India who married for love reported diminished feelings of love if they had been married for more than five years. Those who had arranged marriages reported higher levels of love.
Simmons et al. found that romantic love was valued more in the US and in Germany than in Japan. They argue that romantic love is less valued in more traditional cultures with strong, extended family ties. Dion & Dion have noted that in traditional societies, marriage is often seen as more than just the union of two individuals; it is held to be a union and alliance between two families. Whereas Americans tend to view marriage as a lifetime companionship between two individuals in love, people of many other cultures view marriage more as a partnership formed in order to have children and for economic and social support.
In one of the largest cross-cultural studies on relationships ever undertaken, Buss gave two questionnaires regarding mate selection to more than 10000 respondents from 37 cultures. In 36 out of 37, women ranked financial prospects as more important than males. In all 37, men preferred younger mates, while women preferred older mates.
Cultural norms play an important role in the formation and maintenance of relationships. It has been noted that much of the theory and research on the origins of relationships is a reflection of US culture, and not enough cross-cultural research has been carried out.
Goodwin argues that passionate love is largely a western phenomenon. In the West, marriage is seen as the culmination of loving relationship. In cultures where arranged marriages occur, the relationship between love and marriage is the other way round.
Matsumoto: “The reason for this difference is quite clear. You Americans marry the person you love; we love the person we marry.”
Gupta & Singh found that couples in India who married for love reported diminished feelings of love if they had been married for more than five years. Those who had arranged marriages reported higher levels of love.
Simmons et al. found that romantic love was valued more in the US and in Germany than in Japan. They argue that romantic love is less valued in more traditional cultures with strong, extended family ties. Dion & Dion have noted that in traditional societies, marriage is often seen as more than just the union of two individuals; it is held to be a union and alliance between two families. Whereas Americans tend to view marriage as a lifetime companionship between two individuals in love, people of many other cultures view marriage more as a partnership formed in order to have children and for economic and social support.
In one of the largest cross-cultural studies on relationships ever undertaken, Buss gave two questionnaires regarding mate selection to more than 10000 respondents from 37 cultures. In 36 out of 37, women ranked financial prospects as more important than males. In all 37, men preferred younger mates, while women preferred older mates.
- Analyse why relationships may change or end.